In this week’s What I’m Reading post I showcased a quote from Tony Blauer:

“If you didn’t steal your success, you know that you have the potential to earn it back.”

This is a quote from Tony’s KNOW FEAR PODCAST  and it got me thinking about loss and how our perceptions affect our outcomes as much as our actions do.

Processing loss is a big part of building resilience, staying accountable and making measurable progress towards our goals.

In the moment, loss seems insurmountable but by having a structured process, sometimes with the help of a professional, there is almost nothing that inner strength, will and hard work cannot overcome. Work can take many forms from external to internal.

It is true that sometimes events happen that change the course of our lives, our perceptions and our character. Sometimes, an event happens and it splits your life. There’s a before and an after. But even with losses considered massive on the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale, we are designed to survive – it’s in our basic fundamental nature as humans. And we make a conscious choice to survive, or to let that loss define us. Strength allows us to turn that fear into motivation and ultimately action.

The fear of “the worst that can happen” is almost always worse than the actual loss and consequences if and when it happens.

I always remember this quote from Al Pacino in Glengarry Glen Ross:

And what is it we’re so afraid of? Loss. What else? The bank closes. You get sick. My wife died on a plane. The stock market collapsed. What if these things happen? None of ’em. We worry anyway. Why?

My main takeaway from Tony’s point when I put it through the prism of my own experiences is:

If you experienced success – in anything – you did so through a process. Even if at the time like most entrepreneurs you were flying by the seat of your pants and it all seemed random – you were living the process.

After experiencing an epic loss take the time to do a critical analysis and assessment of every data point leading up to your previous success, the downturn, and the aftermath.  When you figure out the true nature of your past success, you can begin to build a process for the future – and you will be living a resilient life.

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